“When I behold my possibilities,” Kierkegaard wrote, “I experience that dread which is the dizziness of freedom, and my choice is made in fear and trembling.” Many people try to flee anxiety by fleeing choice. This helps explain the perverse-seeming appeal of authoritarian societies—the certainties of a rigid, choiceless society can be very reassuring—and why times of upheaval so often produce extremist leaders and movements: Hitler in Weimar Germany, Father Coughlin in Depression-era America, or Jean-Marie Le Pen in France and Vladimir Putin in Russia. But running from anxiety, Kierkegaard believed, was a mistake because anxiety was a “school” that taught people to come to terms with the human condition.
More than a few people, some of whom think they know me quite well, have remarked that they are struck that I, who can seem so even-keeled and imperturbable, would choose to write a book about anxiety. I smile gently while churning inside and thinking about what I’ve learned is a signature characteristic of the phobic personality: “the need and ability”—as described in the self-help book Your Phobia—“to present a relatively placid, untroubled appearance to others, while suffering extreme distress on the inside.
Scott Stossel
Some social phobics find even positive attention to be aversive. Think of the young child who bursts into tears when guests sing “Happy Birthday” to her at a party—or of Elfriede Jelinek afraid to pick up her Nobel Prize. Social attention—even positive, supportive attention—activates the neurocircuitry of fear. This makes sense from an evolutionary perspective. Calling positive attention to yourself can incite jealousy or generate new rivalries.
Scott Stossel
Individuals who rate high on the so-called Anxiety Sensitivity Index, or ASI, have a high degree of what's known as interoceptive awareness, meaning they are highly attuned to the inner workings of their bodies, to the beepings and bleatings, the blips and burps, of their physiologies; they are more conscious of their heart rate, blood pressure, digestive burblings, and so forth than other people are.
Scott Stossel
The truth is that anxiety is at once a function of biology and philosophy, body and mind, instinct and reason, personality and culture. Even as anxiety is experienced at a spiritual and psychological level, it is scientifically measurable at the molecular level and the physiological level. It is produced by nature and it is produced by nurture. It’s a psychological phenomenon and a sociological phenomenon. In computer terms, it’s both a hardware problem (I’m wired badly) and a software problem (I run faulty logic programs that make me think anxious thoughts). The origins of a temperament are many faceted; emotional dispositions that may seem to have a simple, single source—a bad gene, say, or a childhood trauma—may not.
Scott Stossel
“And no Grand Inquisitor has in readiness such terrible tortures as has anxiety, and no spy knows how to attack more artfully the man he suspects, choosing the instant when he is weakest, nor knows how to lay traps where he will be caught and ensnared, as anxiety knows how, and no sharpwitted judge knows how to interrogate, to examine the accused as anxiety does, which never lets him escape, neither by diversion nor by noise, neither at work nor at play, neither by day nor by night.” —SØREN KIERKEGAARD, The Concept of Anxiety (1844)
Scott Stossel
For the socially anxious, any kind of performance—musical, sporting, public speaking—can be terrifying because failure will reveal the weakness and inadequacy within. This in turn means constantly projecting an image that feels false—an image of confidence, competence, even perfection.
Scott Stossel
Evidence suggests that people with irritable bowels have bodies that are more physically reactive to stress. I recently came across an article in the medical journal Gut that explained the circular relationship between cognition (your conscious thought) and physiological correlates (what your body does in response to that thought): people who are less anxious tend to have minds that don’t overreact to stress and bodies that don’t overreact to stress when their minds experience it, while clinically anxious people tend to have sensitive minds in sensitive bodies—small amounts of stress set them to worrying, and small amounts of worrying set their bodies to malfunctioning. People with nervous stomachs are also more likely than people with settled stomachs to complain of headaches, palpitations, shortness of breath, and general fatigue. Some evidence suggests that people with irritable bowel syndrome have greater sensitivity to pain, are more likely to complain about minor ailments like colds, and are more likely to consider themselves sick than other people.
Scott Stossel
But various studies conducted since the early 1960s suggest that the James-Lange theory was not, after all, completely wrong. When researchers at Columbia gave study subjects an injection of adrenaline, the heart rate and breathing rate of all the subjects increased, and they all experienced an intensification of emotion—but the researchers could manipulate what emotion the subjects felt by changing the context. Those subjects given reason to feel positive emotions felt happy, while those given reason to feel negative emotions felt angry or anxious—and in every case they felt the respective emotion (whatever it happened to be) more powerfully than those subjects who had been given a placebo injection. The injection of adrenaline increased the intensity of emotion, but it did not determine what emotion that would be; the experimental context supplied that. This suggests that the autonomic systems of the body supply the mechanics of the emotion—but the mind’s interpretation of the outside environment supplies the valence.
Scott Stossel
The James-Lange theory was later undermined by research on patients with spinal cord injuries that prevented them from receiving any somatic information from their viscera—people who literally could not feel muscle tension or stomach discomfort; people who were, in effect, brains without bodies—yet who still reported experiencing the unpleasant psychological sensations of dread or anxiety. This suggested that the James-Lange theory was, if not wholly wrong, at least incomplete. If patients unable to receive information about the state of their bodies can still experience anxiety, then maybe anxiety is primarily a mental state, one that doesn’t require input from the rest of the body.
Scott Stossel
I talk a lot in my book about the relationship between conventional ideas about masculinity and courage and anxiety and cowardice and vulnerability. A striking quote posted on gun installations in Malta during World War II said something like: "If you are a man your self-respect will not allow you to admit to anxiety neurosis or to show fear." I think that captures the machismo-at-all costs view that prevails in society. (Also, British officers were allowed to respond to shows of cowardice in the ranks by shooting their own soldiers - or sterilizing them later on). Things have improved since then, but one of my fears about, as it were, coming out about my own anxiety is that I will be perceived to be a lesser man. So far, I've been heartened by the response. People seem to think that being open about vulnerability is brave. Which is funny to me because I'm being told I'm brave for admitting I'm not brave, which is like a zen koan or something.
Scott Stossel
There's lot of research into the relationship between low self-esteem and both anxiety and depression. One school of clinical thought believes strongly that building up patients' sense of "self-efficacy" or "mastery" is key to reducing anxiety and depression.
There were a number of philosophers and other historical figures whose takes on anxiety I liked or found consoling, among them: Aristotle; Galen; Robert Burton; Pascal; Walker Percy. I was very drawn to the work on attachment theory by John Bowlby and Mary Ainsworth, and I spend a long chapter on them - but then I also spend a chapter on the work of Harvard psychologist Jerome Kagan and other scholars of genetics and temperament, whose work somewhat undermines, or at least complicates, the attachment theorists. Robert Sapolsky and Murray Stein and Stephen Suomi have all done fascinating research on social phobia and status in monkey tribes. Finally, I find myself awed by Darwin - not because of the genius of his insights into evolution (though that too) - but because of the epic nervous suffering he had to overcome.
I've finally settled on a pre-talk regimen that enables me to avoid the weeks of anticipatory misery that the approach of a public-speaking engagement would otherwise produce. Let’s say you’re sitting in an audience and I’m at the lectern. Here’s what I’ve likely done to prepare. Four hours or so ago, I took my first half milligram of Xanax. (I’ve learned that if I wait too long to take it, my fight-or-flight response kicks so far into overdrive that medication is not enough to yank it back.) Then, about an hour ago, I took my second half milligram of Xanax and perhaps 20 milligrams of Inderal. (I need the whole milligram of Xanax plus the Inderal, which is a blood-pressure medication, or beta-blocker, that dampens the response of the sympathetic nervous system, to keep my physiological responses to the anxious stimulus of standing in front of you—the sweating, trembling, nausea, burping, stomach cramps, and constriction in my throat and chest—from overwhelming me.) I likely washed those pills down with a shot of scotch or, more likely, vodka, the odor of which is less detectable on my breath. Even two Xanax and an Inderal are not enough to calm my racing thoughts and to keep my chest and throat from constricting to the point where I cannot speak; I need the alcohol to slow things down and to subdue the residual physiological eruptions that the drugs are inadequate to contain.
My method of dealing with my public-speaking anxiety is not healthy. It’s dangerous. But it works. Only when I am sedated to near-stupefaction by a combination of benzodiazepines and alcohol do I feel (relatively) confident in my ability to speak in public effectively and without torment. As long as I know that I’ll have access to my Xanax and liquor, I’ll suffer only moderate anxiety for days before a speech, rather than sleepless dread for months.
I wish I could say that my anxiety is a recent development, or that it is limited to public speaking. It’s not. On ordinary days, doing ordinary things—reading a book, lying in bed, talking on the phone, sitting in a meeting, playing tennis—I have thousands of times been stricken by a pervasive sense of existential dread and been beset by nausea, vertigo, shaking, and a panoply of other physical symptoms. In these instances, I have sometimes been convinced that death, or something somehow worse, was imminent.
Even when not actively afflicted by such acute episodes, I am buffeted by worry: about my health and my family members’ health; about finances; about work; about the rattle in my car and the dripping in my basement; about the encroachment of old age and the inevitability of death; about everything and nothing. Sometimes this worry gets transmuted into low-grade physical discomfort—stomach aches, headaches, dizziness, pains in my arms and legs—or a general malaise, as though I have mononucleosis or the flu. At various times, I have developed anxiety-induced difficulties breathing, swallowing, even walking; these difficulties then become obsessions, consuming all of my thinking.
During first grade, I spent nearly every afternoon for months in the school nurse’s office, sick with psychosomatic headaches, begging to go home; by third grade, stomach-aches had replaced the headaches, but my daily trudge to the infirmary remained the same.
“That’s what your thoughts are waiting for,” Nicholas says, describing how during a panic attack first your own thoughts and then your own body (and sometimes first your body and then your thoughts) betray you. Your thoughts “flood your head with news of the catastrophe unfolding in your body.”
But in believing that anxiety disorders typically arise from failed efforts to resolve basic existential dilemmas, Dr. W. is, as we will see, running against the grain of modern psychopharmacology (which proffers the evidence of sixty years of drug studies to argue that anxiety and depression are based on “chemical imbalances”), neuroscience (whose emergence has demonstrated not only the brain activity associated with various emotional states but also, in some cases, the specific structural abnormalities associated with mental illness), and temperament studies and molecular genetics (which suggest, rather convincingly, a powerful role for heredity in the determination of one’s baseline level of anxiety and susceptibility to psychiatric illness).
Dr. W. doesn’t dispute the findings from any of those modes of inquiry. He believes medication can be an effective treatment for the symptoms of anxiety. But his view, based on thirty years of clinical work with hundreds of anxious patients, is that at the root of almost all clinical anxiety is some kind of existential crisis about what he calls the “ontological givens”—that we will grow old, that we will die, that we will lose people we love, that we will likely endure identity-shaking professional failures and personal humiliations, that we must struggle to find meaning and purpose in our lives, and that we must make trade-offs between personal freedom and emotional security and between our desires and the constraints of our relationships and our communities. In this view, our phobias of rats or snakes or cheese or honey (yes, honey; the actor Richard Burton could not bear to be in a room with honey, even if it was sealed in a jar, even if the jar was closed in a drawer) are displacements of our deeper existential concerns projected onto outward things.
Early in his career, Dr. W. treated a college sophomore who had trained his entire life to become a professional concert pianist. When the patient’s professors told him that he wasn’t talented enough to realize his dream, he was beset by terrible panic attacks. In Dr. W.’s view, the panic was a symptom produced by the patient’s inability to reckon with the underlying existential loss here: the end of his professional aspirations, the demise of his self-conception as a concert pianist. Treating the panic allowed the student to experience his despair at this loss—and then begin to construct a new identity. Another patient, a physician with a thriving medical practice, developed panic disorder when, right around the time his older son went off to college, he began getting injuries playing tennis, a sport at which he had formerly excelled. The panic, Dr. W. concluded, was precipitated by these dual losses (of his son’s childhood, of his own athletic vigor), which in combination aroused existential concerns about decline and death. By helping the physician come to terms with these losses, and to accept the “ontological” reality of his eventual decline and mortality, Dr. W. enabled him to shake free of the anxiety and depression.
In Dr. W.’s view, anxiety and panic symptoms serve as what he calls a “protective screen” (what Freud called a “neurotic defense”) against the searing pain associated with confronting loss or mortality or threats to one’s self-esteem (roughly what Freud called the ego). In some cases, the intense anxiety or panic symptoms patients experience are neurotic distractions from, or a way of coping with, negative self-images or feelings of inadequacy—what Dr. W. calls “self-wounds.”
I find Dr. W.’s existential-meaning-based interpretations of anxiety symptoms to be in some ways more interesting than the prevailing biomedical ones. But for a long time, I found the modern research literature on anxiety—which has much more to do with “neuronal firing rates in the amygdala and locus coeruleus” (as the neuroscientists put it) and with “boosting the serotonergic system” and “inhibiting the glutamate system” (as the psychopharmacologists put it) and with identifying the specific “single-nucleotide polymorphisms” on various genes that predict an anxious temperament (as the behavioral geneticists put it) than with existential issues—to be more scientific, and more convincing, than Dr. W.’s theory of anxiety. I still do. But less so than I did before.
Not long ago in my own therapy with Dr. W., we moved gingerly into “imaginal” exposure for my phobias.r Dr. W. and I established a hierarchy of frightening situations and then did a gentle “staged deconditioning,” in which I was supposed to picture certain distressing images while doing deep-breathing relaxation exercises, hoping to reduce the anxiety these images stimulated. Once I’d conjured an image and was trying to hold it in my mind without panicking, Dr. W. would ask me what I was feeling.
Burton wrote that in the daytime melancholics “are affrighted still by some terrible object, and torn in pieces with suspicion, fear, sorrow, discontents, cares, shames, anguish, etc., as so many wild horses, that they cannot be quiet an hour, a minute of the time.”
What, if anything, do we lose when our anxiety is reduced to the stuff of its physiological components—to deficiencies in serotonin and dopamine or to an excess of activity in the amygdala and basal ganglia? The theologian Paul Tillich, writing in 1944, suggested that Angst was the natural reaction of man to “fear of death, conscience, guilt, despair, daily life, etc.” For Tillich, the crucial question of life was: Are we safe in some deity’s care, or are we trudging along pointlessly toward death in a cold, mechanical, and indifferent universe? Is finding serenity mainly a matter of coming to terms with that question? Or is it, rather more mundanely, a matter of properly calibrating levels of serotonin in the synapses? Or are these somehow, after all, the same thing?
—HIPPOCRATES, On Diseases (FOURTH CENTURY B.C.)
Nerve-disordered bellies are a bane of modern existence. According to a Harvard Medical School report, as many as 12 percent of all patient visits to primary care physicians in the United States are for irritable bowel syndrome, or IBS, a condition characterized by stomach pain and alternating bouts of constipation and diarrhea that most experts believe to be wholly or partly caused by stress or anxiety. First identified in 1830 by the British physician John Howship, IBS has since then been referred to as “spastic colon,” “spastic bowel,” “colitis,” and “functional bowel disease,” among other names. (Physicians in the Middle Ages and Renaissance referred to it as “windy melancholy” and “hypochondriache flatulence.”) Because no one has ever definitively identified an organic cause of IBS, most doctors attribute its appearance to stress, emotional conflict, or some other psychological source. In the absence of a clear malfunction in the nerves and muscles of the gut, doctors tend to assume a malfunction in the brain—perhaps a hypersensitized awareness of sensations in the intestine. In one well-known set of experiments, when balloons were inflated in the colons of both IBS patients and healthy control subjects, the IBS patients reported a much lower threshold for pain, suggesting that the viscera–brain connection may be more sensitive in patients with irritable bowels.
Michael Gershon, a professor of pathology and cell biology at Columbia University, says that the reason antidepressants reduce IBS symptoms is not that they affect neurotransmitters in the brain but that they affect neurotransmitters in the stomach. Some 95 percent of the serotonin in our bodies can be found in our stomachs. (When serotonin was discovered in the 1930s, it was originally called enteramine because of its high concentration in the gut.) Gershon calls the stomach “the second brain” and observes that stomach trouble is as likely to beget anxiety as the other way around. “The brain in the bowel has got to work right or no one will have the luxury to think at all,” he says.
Freud writes that “the human infant is sent into the world more unfinished than the young [of other species]”—meaning that humans emerge much more highly dependent on their fathers and mothers for their survival than do other animals.‖ The infant seems to be born with an instinctive sense that the mother can provide sustenance and succor, and learns very quickly that whereas the mother’s presence equals safety and comfort, her absence equals danger and discomfort. Observing this, Freud concluded that the earliest human anxiety, and thus to some degree the source of all subsequent ones, is a reaction to “the loss of the object”—the “object” being the mother. “This biological factor of helplessness thus brings into being the need to be loved which the human being is destined never to renounce,” Freud writes. The first anxiety is about the loss of a mother’s care; throughout the balance of life, “loss of love...becomes a new and far more abiding danger and occasion for anxiety.”
In the final pages of The Problem of Anxiety, Freud briefly develops the idea that phobic anxiety in adults is the residue of human evolutionary adaptations: phobias of such things as thunderstorms, animals, strangers, being alone, and being in the dark represent “the atrophied remnants of innate preparedness” against real dangers that existed in the state of nature. For early man and woman, being alone, or in the dark, or bitten by a snake or a lion—and, of course, the separation of an infant from his mother—were legitimate mortal threats. In all of this, Freud was anticipating the work of the biologists and neuroscientists who would study phobias in the decades ahead.
—JOHN BOWLBY, A Secure Base
During the postwar decades, neurochemical research would demonstrate that when an infant or an adult is stressed, a cascading series of chemical reactions in the brain produces anxiety and emotional distress; returning to a secure base releases endogenous opiates that make the individual relax and feel safe. Why should this be so?
Back in the 1930s, John Bowlby, already absorbed in his studies of the mother-child bond, discovered the work of the early ethologists. Ethology, the scientific study of animal behavior, suggested that many of the attachment behaviors Bowlby had been observing in humans were universal to all mammals, and it supplied an evolutionary explanation for these behaviors.
The shifts in behavior might appear subtle—the stressed mothers still respond to the babies, they just tend to do so more slowly and less effectively than the unstressed mothers—but the effects can be potent. In a series of experiments, Coplan and his colleagues found that the children of the VFD mothers had higher levels of stress hormones in their blood than the children of the non-VFD mothers—an indication that the mother’s anxiety was being transmitted to the child. The remarkable thing was the duration of the correlation between the mother’s anxiety and the child’s stress hormones: when Coplan examined those original VFD children ten years after the first experiment, their levels of stress hormones were still higher than those of a control group. When they were injected with anxiety-provoking chemicals, their responses were hyperreactive compared with other monkeys’. Evidently, these VFD monkeys had become permanently more anxious: they were less social, more withdrawing, and more likely to display subordinate behavior; they also showed an elevated level of autonomic nervous system activity and a compromised immune response. Here was powerful physiological evidence of what Bowlby had argued half a century earlier: early child-rearing experiences—not just the obviously traumatic ones but subtle ones—have psychological and physical effects on the well-being of the child that persist even into adulthood. Coplan’s team concluded that even brief disruptions in the mother-child relationship can alter the development of neural systems “central to the expression of adult anxiety disorders.”l
Thomas Hobbes, the political philosopher, was born prematurely when his mother, terrified by a rumor that the Spanish armada was advancing toward English shores, went into labor in April 1588. “Myself and fear were born twins,” Hobbes wrote, and he attributed his own anxious temperament to the ambient turmoil of his gestation. Maybe Hobbes’s view that a powerful state needs to protect citizens from the violence and torment they naturally inflict on one another (life, he famously said, is nasty, brutish, and short) had its origins in utero, as his mother’s stress hormones washed through him.
Or do the roots of my anxiety lie even deeper and extend more broadly than the things I’ve experienced and the genes I’ve inherited—that is, in history and in culture? My father’s parents were Jews who emigrated from Weimar Germany. My father’s mother became a nastily anti-Semitic Jew—she renounced her Jewishness out of fear that she would someday be persecuted for it. My sister and I were raised in the Episcopal Church, our Jewish background hidden from us until I was in high school. My father, for his part, has had a lifelong fascination with World War II, and specifically with the Nazis; he watched the 1973–74 television series The World at War again and again. In my memory, that program, with its stentorian music accompanying the Nazi advance on Paris, is the running soundtrack to my early childhood.
The differences in how various cultures and eras have perceived and understood anxiety can tell us a lot about those cultures and eras. Why did the ancient Greeks of the Hippocratic school see anxiety mainly as a medical condition, while the Enlightenment philosophers saw it as an intellectual problem? Why did the early existentialists see anxiety as a spiritual condition, while Gilded Age doctors saw it as a specifically Anglo-Saxon stress response — a response that they believed spared Catholic societies — to the Industrial Revolution? Why did the early Freudians see anxiety as a psychological condition emanating from sexual inhibition, whereas our own age tends to see it, once again, as a medical and neurochemical condition, a problem of malfunctioning biomechanics? Do these shifting interpretations represent the forward march of progress and science? Or simply the changing, and often cyclical, ways in which cultures work?
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