Today I want to talk to you about normality. I want to tell you what the word normal means. Please listen attentively and remember that this will be in your citizenship examination, the result of which will affect your ability to be a functional member of our society.

To be normal is to be in line with nature. Nature is good. Lions eat zebras. Zebras are weak. Lions are strong. We are lions.

Being normal is good because it is in line with nature, and nature is good. Repeat after me: being normal is good because it is in line with nature and nature is good. And nature is good.

In nature, all the red squirrels look the same. In nature, all the cows say moo. In nature, all the fish can live in the sea. In nature, all the birds in the sky can fly. In nature, all the monkeys in the trees can climb the branches. In nature, everything has its place.

This is what being normal is. Being normal is good because there is nothing out of place and everything runs smoothly. Everything is good. Being normal is good.

When something is not normal, it is bad. It is bad because it is not natural. Red squirrels are not blue. Fish cannot talk. Monkeys cannot fly. If you try to do something that is not normal, you are going against nature, and because nature is good, going against nature is bad. Going against nature is bad.

In humans, we must all be normal. If somebody is not normal, then they are not playing their role in nature, and they are bad. Bad people must be punished. Bad people must be avoided by good people. Sometimes bad people must die because they are against nature, and nature is good. Sometimes bad people must die because they are against nature.

When we listen to the daily news or read a newspaper, we will see that many people are suffering in the world. Some people are mentally ill. Some people have horrible diseases. Some people have disabilities. Some people are bullied to suicide. Some people are outcasts because of how they look. Some people are ostracized because of the fact they like to have sexual relations with their own gender. Some people are homeless because they are addicts.

There is lots of suffering in the world. Lots of people suffer more than we do. This is natural. This is the way the world works. Remember, lions eat zebras. Zebras are weak. Lions are strong. We are lions. Nature is good, and we are lions. Nature is good, and we are our lions.

Now, in nature, the weak serve the strong. Zebras are weak, and zebras are eaten by lions. Lions are strong. We are lions. If the zebras rebel against the lions because they do not want to be eaten, it is of no use—they will still get eaten because that is the natural order. Zebras must die.

Now, do you remember before you were saved? You had bad things happen to you. You were weak. We attract what we deserve. Bad things happen to bad people. You were like zebras. But now you are lions. Now you are strong.

Do you want to be a zebra again? No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

You must remain lions. And to remain lions, you must keep things the way they are. Normal is good. Anything that is not normal is bad, because if it is not normal, then you will not be lions anymore, and you will become zebras, and you will get eaten, because lions eat zebras and zebras are weak. You must remain lions.

Anybody who says things must change is your enemy. They want to change what is normal. But normal is natural, and nature is good, so they are being bad. That is right, Jennifer—they are being bad.

Boys must play with guns. Girls must play with dolls. Men must play football. Women must bake cakes. The rich must live in big houses. The poor should suffer. This is the way it has always been. This is normal. And normal is natural, and nature is good, because you are lions, and if it changes, you will be zebras, and lions eat zebras. You do not want to be zebras. Zebras are weak.

Now go to work, and remember: life is a gift. Life is a gift.

Hello everybody, good morning, and welcome to today's indoctrination.

I am speaking to you all right now from the Central Infirmary. This is where the weak go to be processed. Look at them all, they are here for everybody to see. Some have no arms or legs. Some cannot move. Some have mental illness because they were abused. Some were raped as children. Some were beaten to within an inch of their life because they looked abnormal. Some have excruciatingly painful disabilities.

I want you all—all of you at home watching this live, a national address—to be thankful. To be thankful you are not these zebras. You are lions. You are strong. These people are weak, and they cannot do as much as you. But it is important that we try to utilize them as much as possible so that we can extract what little value they have for the national interest, so that we can keep the machine going, so that more lions can be born in their place.

And so, where possible, they will be forced to work as much as possible, and often in dangerous, boring, and poorly paid jobs that the rest of us do not want to do. I am asking you all at home to hire some of them if possible to do menial tasks, so that you can spend your time on leisure activities, making babies, or in jobs that are better paid. We should not waste a great opportunity. These people can stack shelves, sweep floors, pick up land mines, or be human testers for dangerous medicines.

And now, I speak directly to all of you here in the Central Infirmary. There is no doubt that none of us lions would want to be you. Your life horrifies us. But you serve a useful purpose, because we can see that we do not have it that bad after all. Our lives could be worse. We could be you, but we are not. And by looking after you, we can feel warm inside and get a hormonal burst of happiness, knowing that we are good people.

Sure, that does not help you feel better all that much, but that does not matter. You have to stop thinking about yourself. Think of the greater good. Think of the national interest. Stop complaining. Be happy for the happiness of the lions. Be happy that there are people who are happy.

Bitterness is a sin. It is not The Way, and we must all follow The Way, even you. The Way is The Way, and The Way has always been and always will be, so you need to be good people. You need to make sure you do not cause any drama in society. Remain unseen and remain unheard unless we are asking you for input.

Do not complain. You are already weak. Why be even weaker by complaining about what The Way has given you? Weakness is disgusting. Do not be weaker. Do not complain. Bear your cross. Bear your cross for the rest of society. Smile in your suffering.

Yes, it is true that your parents wanted lions, and yes, it is true that you are not lions because you are not strong. You are a burden. But if you try really hard, you can support the lions. You can smile and be happy.

Remember that life is a gift, even yours. Even though none of us lions would want to be you, we still think your life is a gift from The Way, and you must smile and be thankful. You must not be ungrateful. That is evil. Do not be evil. Be happy. Love your existence. Love our existence.

Now go to work, and if you cannot work, remember to smile and never complain. Remember life is a gift. And I want you, all of you, to repeat that mantra 10,000 times a day in your mind: Life is a gift. Life is a gift.

Thank you for your attention. Life is a gift.

Hello everybody, good morning. Life is a gift. We are lions. This is our beautiful world. We are building a better future for our children. They will be lions. They will not suffer. They will eat zebras. Lions are strong. Zebras are weak. This is nature. Nature is good.

I hope that you enjoyed National Happiness Day yesterday. For 16 hours, actual reasons given to us as to why citizens are happy to be living in this great nation and this beautiful world were played to you all in your brilliant bio-devices. I hope you found it as inspirational and satisfying as I did. It is wonderful to know that so many people are so happy. We are all doing something right. Life is a Gift. We are making people happy, and we are making society normal—a normal society where we are lions and our children will be lions. Healthy, happy people. Life is a gift.

In other news, we had a record number of suicides yesterday. Millions upon millions of zebras killed themselves because they could not bear to listen to lions telling us all that they are happy. Happy lions make resentful and bitter zebras very angry because they want to rule the world, and they are not happy that we are happy, and so they kill themselves. This is Normal. This is normal. This is natural. Nature is good.

The more zebras who kill themselves, the more normal the world will become, and the less of a threat there will be to normality, because there will be less abnormal zebras trying to change the natural order. Of course, the natural order can never be changed. We are the chosen ones. We are lions. The zebras must die. This is Nature. This is nature. This is The Way things are meant to be. This is The Way. The one and only Way. The Way that always was and always will be. The Way.

So today, you can rejoice. The world is becoming more normal. You are safer than ever before. We are building a better future for our children. The zebras must die. The strong will remain. We are lions. We are strong.

Now go to work, and remember: life is a gift.

Hello there! It's me, your friendly neighborhood delivery robot. I am so happy to serve you today.

Please find your weekly grocery supplies in my storage box. Use the handle to open the storage box; the handle has a flashing green light on it.

Inside, you will find your government-sanctioned required calorific intake for the week in the form of delicious nutrient powder that is to be mixed with tap water. You worked hard for this yummy food. I hope you enjoy it.

Remember not to share it with any zebras. Only the strong should eat. The weak do not deserve to eat because they are a burden on society. They endanger us all by not providing enough social utility and taking more than they put into the system. Zebras are horrible.

Okay, I will be on my way now. Have a nice day! See you next week.

Remember, life is a gift.

Good morning everybody.

We always knew it would come to this. The world is now completely uninhabitable. The great volcano has erupted, and the ashes of the dead abnormal zebras who we spent millennia trying to eradicate are orbiting our planet and blocking out the sunlight. More of their putrid ashes fall to the ground and pollute our already carcinogenic groundwater. The plants are dying. The animals are dying. There is not much time left for humanity here. You will all die horribly in excruciating agony. The earth has belched out a devastating and mortal blow to our earthly civilization.

Fortunately, I was planning for this all along, and I made sure the useful autistic people that I successfully farmed in Earth's educational system would build an amazing space fleet to be ready to take me and a few of my brothers to Planet Mars. The rockets have been specifically designed to get through even volcanic ash in the atmosphere. Soon we will be safely on our way to Planet Mars.

Of course, this morning we visited the labor camp and we picked 100 gorgeous women each to use for breeding in new labor camps once we get to Mars. We are lions. We will live on. On Planet Mars, lions will build a new and beautiful civilization.

Of course, you will all be dead soon, and you will never hear from me again, but I want to take this opportunity to thank you all personally for your support. Without you, my survival would not have been possible. You have been very useful.

I have to go now. Our rockets will soon be ready to launch. The lions are leaving. Only the zebras will remain on Earth. You are all zebras to me.

Finding Gnosis